69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
either way he was missing a nipple.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
