I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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