i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
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