I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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