she takes plan B like it's going out of style
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
