Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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