yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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