Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
