im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
He showed up in booty shorts and no shirt and said dont laugh dont ask questions and give me a fucking final and no one in class said anything we just sat there speehless
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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