Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
Randomize