how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Randomize