She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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