i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
