It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
