i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
