Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
