new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
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