Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
