This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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