sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
