i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize