She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I think a kid would responsible me up
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
