I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
