So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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