True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
