is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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