Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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