at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Define "chronic" masturbator.
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
