So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
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