I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
