im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
