i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
