ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
They took my balls.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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