i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
