are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
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