So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
