just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I have fence marks all over my body
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
