people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
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