he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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