there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize
