We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Randomize