have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
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