Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
don't judge my taste in strippers
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
We need to get me chipped asap
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
