My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
She told me I should be a condom model.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
