So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
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You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
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I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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