Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
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