why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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