My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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