Sacagawea was the original milf.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize
