Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
Princesses don't give blow jobs
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
